Casual Conversation
by Lilly Tagloft
Summary: Raven and Trevor have entertaining conversations, but this one takes the cake. A quick, all-dialogue fic that will make you laugh out loud. Oneshot.


**Casual Conversation**

_An all-dialogue story about my two favorite bickering bicker-ers from Vampire Kisses (Trevor and Raven xD)_

* * *

"Hey freak!"

"What do you want?"

"Me? Nothing from you if that's waht you're getting at."

"As if I would give you any."

"You totally want to do me, you just can't admit it."

"Wipe that smirk off your face before I kick your ass and spread you across your beloved soccer field."

"Someone can't admit their true feelings."

"You're just saying that because you want me to believe that you hate me when the truth of the reality is that you love me and you can't do anything to stop it. You can try all you want, but you will never not love me."

"You're a fag."

"Sounds like false reasoning for why you shouldn't fall in love with me."

"It's not false. You are a fag; I saw you and Matt yesterday - you looked pretty close in that huddle."

"I am not gay with Matt! Just because we may have accidentally kissed once-"

"Omigod! I so knew you were gay!"

"-doesn't mean that I'm a freaking homo!"

"I can't wait to tell everyone."

"You do that Monster Girl, see who believes you in the end. Which will be no one."

"I wouldn't be too sure."

"Why is that?"

"I"m recording this conversation."

"No you aren't!"

"Why are you going pale then, huh? I know you know I'm recording this."

"Y-You can't be! Isn't that illegal or something?"

"Nope."

"Stop doing that creepy smile thing!"

"What creepy smile thing?"

"That creepy smile thing that you're doing right now?"

"You mean this?"

"STOP SMILING!"

"Nope."

"STOP IT!"

"Aww... Are you going to cry to your mommy about it? Tell her that the awful, goth girl gave you a friendly gesture and that I should be thoroughly punished because of it?"

"Don't patronize me!"

"Too late."

"Quit the smiling already!"

"I can't help it. Something about your awkwardness makes me smile."

"... I make you smile, huh?"

"Hey, now - Quit smiling at me like that!"

"Like what, Raven?"

"Like that! Your stupid, sexy smi- ..."

"Sexy?"

"What? I didn't mention anything about being sexy - especially if it's about you."

"I'm pretty sure you did."

"No I didn't."

"Where's your recording device - I can prove it to you."

"No you can't! I can erase it before you even have a chance to prove that I called your smile sexy!"

"HA! You just admitted it!"

"What? No I did not!"

"RAVEN MADISON THINKS I'M SEXY!"

"Shut up! And goddamnit! Stop wtih the smirk already! That's what got me in this trouble in the first place!"

"RAVEN MADISON THINKS-"

"SHUDDUP!"

"Does the little Monster Girl not want the world to know that she think I'm sexy?"

"No I don't! So just freaking shut up!"

"... :D"

"Why are you smiling like that, Trevor? Trevor...? Okay, just back the fuck away from me. Trevor!"

...

"I hate you, you fucking Soccer Snob."

"What? Because I'm a good kisser?"

"No! I hate you because you're just a freaking Neanderthal that thinks he can kiss me whenever the hell he pleases, well I will not stand for- ..."

"Are you sure you won't stand for it?"

"Yes. You want to know why?"

"Humor me."

"Because... TREVOR MITCHELL AND MATT WELLS HAVE WILD BUTT SEX!"

"I'm going to fucking kill you."

"EVERY SINGLE NIGHT!"

"You're just asking for it now..."

"IN THE CHURCH BASEMENT!"

"..."

"Wait, why are you reaching for my neck? Trevor?"

"I'm going to fucking kill you!"

"Tell Becky I'm sorry that her boyfriend is gay! It wasn't supposed to come out this way!"

"Hold still! I can't get a good grip on your neck!"

"How stupid do you think I am? I'm not going to stand still so that you can just strangle me."

"Have you seen your SAT scores?"

"Fair enough, but stop grabbing at my neck you butt raper."

"I'll rape your butt if you don't shut the hell up."

"That's sexual harrassment! I'm going to tell Ms. Mason!"

"No you're not bcause she won't believe you."

"MS. MASON! TREVOR'S SEXUALLY HARRASSING ME! I HAVE IT RECORDED!"

"Fuck you."

"You wish."

"... Yeah."


End file.
